Over the course of this article series, I’ve talked about quite a few elements that come together to make a happy family. But there is one essential item to remember.
Every happy family is different.
We’re made up of different types of people. We have different histories, traditions and memories; different needs and dreams. We show love and acceptance in a variety of ways.
One family might hug each other every time they meet or leave. Another might find that uncomfortable. Some grown kids need to call home every day, and others might check in once a month. Traveling may be the passion of one group, while another family might never leave their hometown.
Every family has quirks that no other set of people will quite understand. It doesn’t make one group right or the other wrong. It simply is what it is.
I don’t think you really understand how unique your family is until you welcome a new member or join another family; this happens most frequently in the context of marriage. When I married into my husband’s family, most of their ideas and traditions charmed me. I loved the closeness and the honesty and most especially the love. But it took me a while to adjust to things that were foreign to me, and I know this was true for my husband, too, as he grew accustomed to my family. I saw this again when my daughter married this summer.
Yes, we’re all different. . .not better, not worse, just not the same. And when two people step tentatively from their families of origin in order to form a new home of their own, they take with them bits and pieces of their pasts. It takes time and attention to sift through that baggage and determine what works and what doesn’t, within the context of a brand new family.
There will be missteps and lots of trial and error. But in the end, it will all come together, just like your family’s favorite recipe. All the disparate ingredients form a delicious new dish.
Because after all, that’s what makes a family.
Happy Family 4
Tawdra Kandle has completed 3 young adult novels and is currently working on her forth. She is a contributor for Taking Time for Mommy – Online Magazine for Moms sharing her homeschooling adventures and couponing tips. She is also an administrator of the Time 4 Mommy Community and heads up our .
You can find Tawdra on Twitter and follow her blog Publishing Quest.