The Secrets of Happy Families

When you look at your life, the greatest happinesses are family happinesses.† ~Joyce Brothers

Go to any restaurant—any family restaurant, that is—and take a look around.  You can probably figure out pretty easily which familes are content and which ones are unhappy.  Whether it’s the facial expressions, the screaming kids or the quarrelsome parents, it’s hard to miss them.

But what about the happy families?  Can you pick them out as well?  They’re probably the ones where peace reigns around the table and everyone has happy faces.

Is this a gross generalization? Well. . .yes.  Plenty of happy families have their moments of tension and upset, and plenty of unhappy families have moments of joy.  So then what makes up a happy family?

While this is clearly a matter of opinion in many ways, I think there are a few elements upon which most people can agree.

In happy families, the children are well-behaved without being automatons.  They respect their parents and their siblings.  They understand the rules that exist, and even when they don’t necessarily agree, they try to follow those rules.  They feel loved and secure in their own unique position in the family structure.

In happy families, the parents are also well-behaved.  They don’t throw fits at soccer games or place unreasonable demands on their children.  They respect their children and understand that they are individuals with feelings and needs.  They exercise a form of lenient dictatorship or limited democracy; everyone is heard, but not everyone can be in charge.

So how do you get from to that point?  What secrets do the parents (and children!) in happy families understand that escapes others?

That’s what we’re going to explore in this series of articles. So whether you find yourself struggling with elements of your family life that frustrate you, or you’re just beginning your adventure as a family and want some tips, keep reading.

NEXT WEEK:  Part 2: Who’s In Charge

Tawdra Kandle has completed 3 young adult novels and is currently working on her forth. She is a contributor for Taking Time for Mommy – Online Magazine for Moms sharing her homeschooling adventures and couponing tips. She is also an administrator of the Time 4 Mommy Community and heads up our Writing Group.

You can find Tawdra on Twitter and follow her blog Publishing Quest.