How dumb can a criminal be? Dumb enough to make you laugh out loud at these true stories of really dumb criminal activity. This volume of Professor Birdsong’s 117 Dumbest Criminal Stories: The Southwest is written just for fun and enjoyment. It showcases the kind of many funny and weird criminal law stories that he has found and written about since 2010. The stories in this volume come to you from the states of Arizona, California, New Mexico, and Texas — the Southwest region of the U.S. Professor Birdsong has found out a lot of dumb criminal stories from the Southwest. They include, Drunk and/or Disorderly Dummies from the Southwest; Dumbest Robbers of the Southwest; and includes a chapter of the most bizarre dumbest criminals of the Southwest.
Readers will learn of:
- the cross-dressing San Diego man who went on a rampage in a Denny’s restaurant when he believed that his cell phone had been stolen;
- the story of the California man arrested for hoarding and keeping more than 400 snakes in his home;
- the burglar who was arrested after he tried to break into a college office and became so entangled in the venetian blinds he could not get out;
- then there is the Texas “panty robber’ who for two years broke into homes and stole women’s underwear;
- the Arizona story about the bank robber who pulled off the job, received money and was caught shortly thereafter when he stopped down the street from the bank where he stopped and ordered beer and pizza with some of the bank loot;
- the one about the Dallas woman who bit off her boyfriend’s lower lip while kissing him at midnight at a New Year’s party – she was charged with aggravated assault;
- the Texas bank robber after receiving the loot tipped the teller with one of the $20 bills she had just given him;
and so many other stories about dumb criminals from the Southwest that make this anthology worth reading and will make you laugh out loud.
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We know you teach law by day, what made you decide to write these funny stories
I do teach law by day. Criminal Law is my favorite subject. When I began teaching law in 1998 I would tell my students to read the local section of their local newspaper where they would find true criminal law stories of the type we read and discuss in class. However, by 2008 few students read newspapers, so in 2008 I started a weekly blog for my students on which I would post class assignments for them. In order to keep their interest I would find funny stories about dumb and weird criminals and I would post several funny stories on the blog each week – My students love them. By 2010 I had so many stories I found a small publisher to help turn some of the stories into humor books.
In 2013 I began my own publishing company – Winghurst Publications.
Which has been your favorite story so far?
Oh my – there are so many. Some are tragic and some are just laugh out loud funny. One of my favorites was the story out of China wherein a shopkeeper asked a woman to not park her motorbike in front of his shop. She then grabbed his testicles and squeezed them so tightly that the man went into shock and died.
Another favorite was about a very large 400 pound lady who was arrested for fraud and during the pat down police discovered 2,600 stashed in her bra.
You’ve written several of these stories, do you have plans to write anymore?
Oh yes, I plan to write more. I now have fourteen Kindle humor books on Amazon.com. Three of them are in the top 100 of the “lawyer humor” genre. I have three more books in process for publication in 2016. There will never be an end to dumb and weird criminal law stories.
What is next for you? Do you have any book signings or other appearances?
Since most of my books are eBooks there is nothing to sign. However, I have been asked by local writers’ groups to appear and tell them my experiences in ePulbishing.
Professor Birdsong received his J.D. from the Harvard Law School and his B.A. from Howard University. He teaches law in Orlando, Florida. After graduation from law school he worked four years at the law firm of Baker Hostetler. He then entered into a varied and distinguished career in government service. He served as a diplomat with the U.S. State Department with various postings in Nigeria, Germany and the Bahamas. Professor Birdsong later served as a federal prosecutor. After leaving government service, and before he began teaching, Professor Birdsong was in private law practice in Washington, D.C.